The Fake Humility of Ugly.

Head in the sky.

Ugly. Alone. Outcast. Nobody wants to talk to you. People walking by say hi but never hello. You crave for attention. You want people to give you attention. But you were so socially isolated you never learnt that the prequel to clicking is empathy. You blast your awkward ideas into conversations hoping for a response that you never truly get. You wonder why you dont have a best friend. Everyone you know are just acquaintances, friends for a fleeting moment.

A boy notices that you are down and gives you a bit of attention. You welcome his attention. You enjoy his company. He grows fond of you, and despite a little social awkwardness, likes your humble quiet personality.

Time passes. Less ugly. You start to build up your social life. You revel in the attention you finally receive. A confused boy supports and encourages your efforts. Seasons change. Your self confidence picks up. You take the boy for granted. You expect attention but are unwilling to give anything in return.

The naive boy wakes up. He realizes he has become a cuddle b1tch. "But maybe she's just shy?", he thought. So he tries to reason with her to no avail.

The foolish boy lets you know why he wants to turn away. He makes it very clear to you that "IT IS WRONG TO LET A GUY SPEND TIME/EFFORT/MONEY/HEART ON YOU IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN HIM!!". She acts like nothing happened..ignoring moments of intimacy and says "We're just friends". He feels betrayed. He knows he wouldnt have spent as much time/effort/money/heart if he knew you weren't interested earlier on. He realizes that he has been played on. Could have he misinterpreted your behaviour? He thinks not. There are some things 'just friends' simply dont do with one another.

The month of forgiveness beckons. The stupid boy decides it's time to resume platonic relations. "People change after all" he thought to himself... He was wrong. While enjoying his hospitality, and in the presence of company, you have the audacity to gloat about how some older single guy is willing to spend thousands of dollars to fly to australia to see you. even though you have no interest in him as a lover and see him only as a friend. Arrogance. Have you learnt nothing?

b1tch.



Note: Comments for this post have been disabled - people were getting the wrong idea. This post serves to highlight what I would like to refer to as arrogance in the context of relationships. It is not gender specific as the post may imply. Consider the following:
1) Girls that abuse their beauty/attractiveness to get free dates / dinners /movies / trips with guys they are not really interested in. They give the guy false hopes and when push comes to shove, they will use the 'just friends' excuse - regardless of whatever intimate moments they may have shared.
2) Guys that abuse their position/power/dominance to get companionship/intimacy with women they are not really interested in. They give the girl false hopes and when a prettier girl comes along, they will tell the girl that they are not meant to be etc.

This post is about how some people are humble in the context of relationships when they are unattractive/ugly... but become arrogant when they perceive that they are receiving more attention from others.

I have no respect for these people. Boy or girl.

Melons, Goldfish and Foamely Esctasy.

Hailstones In The Sun

WATCH THIS VIDEO

Very hot video. This is the kind of video that makes teenage boys sit crossing their legs while the girls go green in jealous envy.

NOW WATCH HER SING IT IN ENGLISH

~lost in translation - the lyrics are real. see video above if you dont believe it.~

It's got fruits, animals, "foamely escasy" and involves an "overstressed uncle". Weird, kinky, and a little animalphilic/frutiphilic in a disturbing kinda way. There is some incest thrown in as well. It takes an awesomely hot girl like Alizee to pull off such lyrics.

Bubbles and water, Legs up for hours,
My goldfish is under me, To bathe for hours
Makes my mouth water, Im foamely ecstatic.

I lazy round. Melon and water.
Is it a sin?
Bombs, you keep away from me!
Today lying low, twisting up my toes.

Im fed up with loneliness,
With my uncle overstressed
Fumbling, crawling for something
Im fed up with creeps crying.

Over the past, such a sin.
Not to be cool, but a fool
If I could mess up their rules.
Im fed up with your complaints
Baby, well Im not a saint!


...I want to be her goldfish.

This blog had its 15,000th visitor today!

The Real Game Of Love

Darkness...

First, a few definitions:
Social Dominance: in control of one's life and has a certain level of connectedness with those in his social circle. In the modern world, social dominance is difficult to achieve without money, but possible on a tight budget none the less.
Pretty: sexually attractive / proportionate (whatever your definition of sexual attractiveness may be)
Ugly: not sexually attractive / disproportionate (note: it's not about being slim or chubby...)

1) Consider The Following Statements

Guys like girls who are pretty.
Girls like guys who are socially dominant.

Guys would not usually think of actively courting / spending resources on girls whom they are not at least a little bit sexually attracted (or physically aroused by) to.
Girls would not usually think of actively trying to get the attention of guys whom they perceive as being weak.

Guys try to court the pretty girls.
Pretty girls have a wide choice of guys.
Pretty girls will not usually settle for guys who are non-socially dominant.

Girls try to attract the socially dominant guys.
Socially dominant guys have a wide choice of girls.
Socially dominant guys will not usually settle for girls who are ugly.

Your "average" girl may just so happen to appeal to a really socially dominant guy.
Your "average" guy may just so happen to appeal to a really pretty girl.

2) Face The Truth

Being pretty improves a girl's chances of finding the right guy who is reasonably socially dominant, reasonably well built, and compatible.

Being socially dominant improves a guy's chances of finding the right girl who is reasonably charming/feminine, reasonably sexually attractive, and compatible.

3) Reality Bites

Think about the girl who realizes that she's in her 30s and has never dated. She was never sexually attractive enough to have a guy who was up to her expectations ask her out. To avoid feeling bad, she tells herself that she was distracted by the pursuit of knowledge and wealth/career. Her biological clock is ticking. She knows she's way past her prime... Her ovaries are not going to wait for her. They are shriveling by the day...
Not all girls are pretty.
The average girl learns that the most eligable bachelors are out of her reach and looks elsewhere. She finds a guy who he thinks is right for her. She calls it love after awhile.

Now what about the guy who never attracted the attention of a girl whom he finds reasonably attractive? He has never really had any real experience with women. Now he finds himself shy to ask girls out because of bad experiences (with the pretty girls who had more eligable suitors). He's been working for 10 years and now has his own little humble place. He's feeling lonely and knows that his youth is nearing it's end. He's never even gotten laid before (ok, that's a bit cruel to say)
Not all guys are socially dominant.
The average guy learns to lower his expectations/standard to a point where he is comfortable. He finds a girl who he thinks is right for him. He calls it love after awhile.

4) Caveats

a. Cultural compatibility plays a key role in finding a life partner. Social dominance or beauty will not guarantee the person you find attractive is right for you.
b. Different people have different standards for beauty/attractiveness/social dominance. Mika recently wrote a song about how chubby girls are attractive in their own way. DONT JUDGE PEOPLE too much.
c. Attractiveness may literally be "chemical". Scientists now believe that people with differing sets of genes for bacterial/viral immunity are more likely to like each other's natural scent (eg. the smell of your t shirt after you've worn it all night to sleep).

What im trying to say is that there are other factors that come in to play asides from the major ones in red and blue.

Personally...

...the person whom i very much would have liked to spend my life with was NOT the prettiest person i've ever dated. We were compatible, and in her I saw "home". I cant explain it, but I did find her reasonably attractive. Unfortunately, we were to go our separate ways...

I recently completed placement at a health center where I dealt with issues pertaining to indigenous healthcare. Much of it dealt with a "sense of place". It is not some special connection indigenous people have with the land - it is actually inherent in all people from all cultures. In retrospect, that may have been why I saw 'home' in her. More on that another day.

Thank you for reading. Comments and feedback are very much welcome =)

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